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How to talk to your parent about moving to assisted living and get them moved in

March 26th, 2021

Aging isn’t easy, but it’s something that we all do and will likely have to face someday. Some families are fortunate enough to be able to live near and take care of their aging parents, but that’s not an option for everyone. 

If you’re hoping to get your parent or parents into an assisted living community like ours, we’ve created this resource to help you get that conversation started.

The first step is to talk to them

Initiating what could be a difficult conversation can be nerve-racking. How are they going to react? What if the conversation upsets them? Will they understand where you’re coming from?

You can stress over all of these hypothetical concerns for as long as you want, but you’ll never really know until you just start the conversation. Based on what we’ve heard from our residents’ family members, you might be surprised to find that your parents are more open to the idea of moving to a senior living community than you assume.

Before you talk to them, think of some relevant details that apply to them and their lives. 

  • If you’ve noticed they don’t spend much time with friends, you can highlight the fact that senior living communities are full of people they can make friends with.
  • If your parent isn’t eating well or enough, tell them about the wonderful meals and chefs at assisted living communities.
  • Has your parent expressed a desire to see a new part of the country? Moving to a community is a perfect opportunity to leave their hometown and start a new chapter of life in a different state.

Help them find their dream home

Now that you’ve started the conversation, the next step is to work with your parent to find the assisted living community that’s just right for them. 

Location: You may find that it’s easiest to narrow down options by state or climate. Does your parent want to live in a sunny, warm, dry location? Southern California might be the place to go (we’re admittedly a bit biased)! Have they dreamed of living with the Rocky Mountains in their backyard? There are many wonderful assisted living communities in Denver. Or maybe they just want to stay in the town they already live in.

Amenities: One of the best things about assisted living is all the assistance! Most communities are going to have all of the standard amenities (housekeeping, chef-prepared meals, medication management, assistance with daily bathing and grooming), but only the best go above and beyond with special offerings like a fireside library, on-site whirlpool, and walking paths through beautifully landscaped gardens.

Ask your parent what matters most to them, and make sure that all the senior living communities you’re considering have the amenities that meet their needs.

Community of Friends: What better way to choose a community to live in than one where you’ve already got friends? If your parent knows someone who has already moved to a senior living community, you should consider the location as an option for your parent.

Help with the move and visit often

Once you’ve helped your parent or parents find the assisted living community that’s perfect for them, the day of the big move will eventually come. It’s very important that you help and support them in every way possible since moving to a new living situation is stressful no matter the circumstances. If they’ve decided to move across the country, plan on flying or driving with them and staying for a few days to help them get acclimated.

After your parent is all settled in, give them a few weeks on their own to develop daily rhythms, make friends, and integrate into the community. And then: visit often! One of the main reasons seniors have a negative view about senior living communities is a feeling of abandonment by their family and children. Make sure they know that you’re still a part of their lives by coming to see them on a regular basis.

Help your parents take the next big step in their lives

Now that you know how to start the conversation, there’s no reason to wait. Ask your parents how they feel about joining an assisted living community and help them make a big change in their lives.

If you’re looking for a senior living community in southern California, Serento Rosa would be happy to have you! Contact us online or call 714-452-1846 to set up an appointment to visit us in Yorba Linda.

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